Then Again
by Vaiyala
Summary: We're never really given insight on what causes his behavior, to tell the truth... Maybe...this? HINTED SLASH WARNING! This is an upgraded reposting of a story I wrote a long time ago. Oh, and I'm aware I can't write summaries... Sorry!


**Author's Notes**

**Yes, I'm writing a GroverxPercy fanfiction, but don't worry, there's no "action****"****. It's just a little bit of wistful thinking on Grover's part. The reason I'm doing this is simple: If it weren't for Annabeth, then these two would make a cute couple (and a friend of mine requested it). And it's really more of an experiment fanfic than anything (so Percabeth fans, don't get upset or anything) but I figured that posting it here wouldn't hurt…much. =P **

**Enjoy! I can't think of a cute little name combination for them(haha).**

**Disclaimer: If I owned PJO, then Grover would have a much bigger part. And I'd make Annabeth fat because we need more fat love interests in today's novels.**

**NOTE: This was written right after I read The Sea of Monsters, before I checked the other books out, so just be warned that things might seem out of place due to that little fact. I've read up to the Battle by now but I didn't feel the story would flow if I tweaked the events, therefore I left them alone.**

**ANOTHER NOTE: Please don't flame the story because you hate the pairing. I'm warning you right now what it's about so you don't even have to read it. Just to make it clear, though... This story has **_**hinted **_**Grover/Percy in it (which means no "action") and I **_**do **_**realize this is a bogus pairing (even if, as stated above, they'd be adorable). I did it for **_**fun **_**and because it was requested.**

**That being said...enjoy!**

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Gusts of chilled air whipped through the tree tops, ripping the leaves away before tossing them into the sky. Below, trudging among the foliage that littered the forest floor, Grover folded his arms across his chest and huddled against himself for warmth. It didn't do much; his legs continued to tremble with every step he managed to take, and after some time he simply gave up, falling against a pile of mismatched boulders that sat beneath one of the enormous oaks.

No doubt, it could be safely said that things were not going as well as he planned.

This was the second search he'd issued for himself in hopes of finding Pan and already, he had encountered three storms. None of the previous could compare to this one, however, that was for certain. The atmosphere carried the scent of rotting plants and drying mud, sending his senses drifting into nirvana every now and then. Unquestionably, not the best of days.

Grover pushed back a few stray wisps of hair that had been blowing into his face and clutched his messenger bag close to his side. The three tin cans that remained inside jabbed him, the minute pain only adding to his discomfort.

_Rain…there's definitely gonna be rain_, he thought. As if on cue, a droplet of chilled water stung his cheek, followed by a drizzle of others.

"Oh, that's _real_ nice," he muttered out loud.

Grover Underwood, the first satyr to discover the whereabouts of the nature god, Pan––maybe it was just a fantasy after all. No progress, constant danger in which he was the one in distress, and no one to trust in, no one who really believed he could do it. Except for… Grover sighed and drew his awkwardly bent knees to his chest, burying his face into the damp fabric of his jeans. It didn't offer any comfort, but the thought that entered his head at that moment did its best to do so.

_Percy._ He groaned and shook himself, banging his head on the stone behind him. _No, no, no! Stop, don't think like that!_

A rod of white lightning suddenly streaked across the shaded sky, as if Zeus were telling him to shut up. The young satyr heeded this and decided on mental contemplation, but no matter how many times he told himself otherwise, there was no way he could deny the truth lingering just beyond his normal range of thought. Not that he wanted to experience such things; it was wrong, even if Pan thought differently, and it had always been his goal in life to do the right thing.

"Then again," he murmured, "I've been slacking in every other area concerning what's right, so why not? Why can't I––" He bit his lip hard enough to draw blood, allowing his gaze to wander down among the scattering leaves in front of him. "Why can't I like him...like this?" And yet he already knew the answer, of why he would never be able to succumb to his twisted emotions, those that were almost as twisted as the confusion they spurred on a daily basis.

Simply put… Percy didn't share his feelings, of this he was sure. The gestures, including brief hugs and contact, were merely signs of friendship in the demigod's eyes. _Besides, why would he even consider liking a satyr–_– _And me, of all people?_ He had Annabeth, after all.

The girl was everything a teenage boy could want: smart, beautiful, brave, and of course, female. It was no wonder that Percy was attracted to her, and in some way, Grover was happy for him. But glancing into the puddle of rainwater gathering by his hip, he was instantly reminded of all that he lacked, and all he'd ever despised about himself. Sure, he had grown exceedingly over the past few years so that his scrawny frame filled out with slight muscles, and yes, most of his acne had disappeared. But what did it matter? He was still the same, through and through, and no amount of physical alterations would ever change that.

The blistering wind picked up its pace as he sat there in silence, tolerating the twigs and weeds that brushed his cheeks as they swept past in a blur. Breathing deeply, he backed into the boulder and closed his eyes, absentmindedly stroking the dark gashes that disfigured his left wrist and forearm. It was a nasty human habit he'd learned of when in school, and although he'd sworn never to take it up, he found it to be quite the opposite of what he'd expected. Emotional build-ups always vanished much quicker than they would have if he'd just left them there to fester and grow.

"You know, self mutilation isn't the answer, idiot," Clarisse had told him once. This had occurred on one of her usual "Jump the Satyr" days, when she had wrestled him to the ground and caught sight of the wounds he had strived to keep hidden. "I don't know what your problem is," she'd added, "but you'd better get over it soon. You're starting to make me depressed." Grover scoffed and blew lazily at the bangs stuck to his forehead.

_Like I'd ever take advice from Ares' kid_, he thought bitterly. _She doesn't understand, anyway._

Several minutes passed as Grover sat still, overcome with a hopeless state of mind. He had forced all thoughts from his mind, leaving himself void, a hollow aching in his heart. It was almost literal. When the storm began to die down enough for him to see clearly, he settled on making contact with Percy via their empathy link, hoping that his presence would urge him to get up and move along.

_It's been about two months_, Grover thought. _But will he even want to see me? No, of course he will. Whether he likes me that way or not, we're still best friends. I… I think…_ Taking a breath, he concentrated on getting in touch with Percy, drawing energy to forge the connection. At first, nothing happened. Then, a faded image came into view, shimmering until an opaque figure stood there, untouched by the weather. He blinked, gazing around to take in his surroundings, and then he turned to Grover with a crooked smile.

"Hey, G-man!" he said.

"Heh…hey, Percy," Grover said, returning the grin with some difficulty.

"Oh…: Percy's eyebrows rose, and Grover knew that he must have been considering his current condition. "Are you in trouble again?"

"What–– Oh, no. Nah, I'm fine."

"Then why––"

"Why'd I call you?"

"Well, I was gonna ask why you're sitting on the ground in the rain, but that works." For some reason, Grover found it suddenly difficult to answer him.

"I just… I guess I only…wanted to see you," he muttered. "But if you're busy, you know, I can always do it later."

"No, that's not it," Percy said, shaking his head. "It's alright. I wanted to see you, too. It's been way too long. Ah, but I can't stay, not right now."

"Why?"

"Uh… Well, you see, every time you do this when I'm not asleep, I sort of pass out."

"Really? Oh, sorry man. I didn't know."

"It's okay. I was training with Annabeth and she's probably freaking out right now. You know, I gotta go check on her."

"Maybe I should let you go, then, huh?"

"Probably so."

Grover forced a weak laugh, though inside he was throbbing with a sort of rage. Less than five minutes, and he was having to leave so soon? He didn't say anything about this despite the growing urge to and instead, he simple whispered, "'Kay, then. I'm sorry for bothering you."

"Bothering? Grover, you weren't bothering me! I've been waiting for you to call me ever since you left, and when you finally decided to do that, you did it during a bad time. That's all." Percy stooped low so that he was eye-level with Grover, and then he cocked his head, beaming still. "Seriously, you can call me anytime you want. I want you to! Just try and do it when I'm asleep, all right? We need to keep in touch, G-man. I dunno, sometimes I just get really worried about you, and I'd never put things like training above you. You should know that by now." Grover nodded meekly and stared into his eyes, hoping to find in that moment some trace of emotion other than that of a caring friend. It wasn't there, and he knew it wouldn't be, but for some reason or another, he found that he didn't really mind as much as he had a moment before. What mattered was that Percy _did_ feel concern for him, whether it was out of love or not, and even though this saddened him, Grover couldn't help but be glad in some sense.

Love could do that to a person. He would never quite understand why.

He reached up and grasped Percy's hand momentarily, flashing him a confident grin, and with a final good-bye, he severed the empathy link, watching as his best friend vanished. The rain stopped sometime after that but Grover had long since moved from that patch of dirt below the boulder. As he made his way through the damp forest and peered through the hazy mist settling there, he began to hum to himself, something he often did when feeling elated.

He couldn't really help it.

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**Abrupt endings are super. =3 Reviews are much appreciated!**


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